Tag Archives: Learning

Favourites of an Introvert- Beware Eagles ahead

Hola,

Today yet again I share the same statement as I do before everything I post. Okay, so I haven’t been able to post for the past seven months blah blah blah (fill it in yourself 🙂 ). This time it wasn’t my studies, exams or mood swings (i hate to say that) so, I had been terribly ill (ground breaking/ shaking illness as I call it) for the past six months straight. A rather contagious illness actually, I’ll be discussing it in the next post this week since this post isn’t at all about that. So, no writing, sketching and painting for the past months however, a previous work that holds immense value to me would be shared here.

After several rough patches, physical and emotional breakthroughs and misery finally, I am back on my track and have started doing and enjoying things i used to do before. So presenting an eagle sketch on sketch paper. Dark charcoal on paper (cant recall the dimensions.. oops!). 

This one is among the very few sketches which didn’t take much time and were made instantaneously. Moreover, with this (and many more other things) I believe that the things done and decisions made instantaneously are often more rewarding than those with long term planning. (Trying to work on it in my life as well.. lets hope so).

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Eagle Hunt
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..

Weekly Photo Challenge: 2017 Favourites

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Into the ‘Past’ as I Reflect

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What the Mirror shows from ‘Past’.

HIM
You guys randomly start talking one day on the phone.
He compliments you & tells you that you sound pretty & cute.
He asks you about your past relationship & you ask him about his.
You then share & tell him more stories about your past & he tells you about his.

He starts flirting with you & you start flirting back.
Then he asks you for you to meet and you planned it right away.
He tells you he has fever but he would still come to meet you.
He had fever he was sick but still he stood waiting for an hour just for you.
He said he knew you’ve committed so you’ll come.

Soon talking to him becomes a part of your daily routine & you wait for him everyday to text you.
Whenever you receive something from him, you start smiling & your day instantly becomes better.
He talks to you daily asking how your day went.
You talk to him all night & he always asks if you are tired & if you want to go to bed.
The night conversations you have with him are always the best & the deepest.
You sleep when he sleeps & he sleeps when you sleep.
Now he wants to meet up & hangout with you.

When you meet up with him, you feel even more chemistry with him & you feel butterflies in your stomach every time you talk to him.
Now you tell your friends how much of an amazing guy he is & you are interested in him.
Soon he confesses that he is interested in you & you tell him we are just friends.
You like his reaction whenever you make him realize that we are just friends.
It gives you a clinge of how much he wants you.
You feel like you’re the happiest girl alive & the feeling is so strong between you guys.

You spend whole days and nights thinking of him and imagining what he would have been doing now.
He always tells you before hanging up the phone “Just take care of yourself”.
He tells you to have some rest whenever you tell him about your regular kidney pain.
And you tell him to please just stop smoking.
He says he tried and will try again.

He tells you again and again that many girls are after him.
Then hours and hours are spent listening to the stories of other girls.
You realize that he is doing that on purpose.
You get irritated but just would never show.
You thought about doing the same to him but just couldn’t.
There could not have been any other guy that you could even imagine … Except HIM.

He criticizes the nudity promoted in the films.
He says he denies to be a part of the crowd.
You consider him different and had no doubts.

You get annoyed when friends tease you by his name.
Still you smile just because it’s His name.
You never tell him how you actually feel.
You realize “Denial is another form of acceptance”
Just because you fear that you’ll loose him some day.
You start ignoring him just to escape from what you feel.
He is amused, disappointed; but just vain enough to ask.

The ignorance is breaking you from inside.
He stops putting effort into talking to you.
You think he is angry because of what you did.
He stops telling you to take care of yourself.
And responding positively when you tell him not to smoke.
You cry at nights, you’ve never felt that way.
You used to laugh at the love birds in school and see now you deserved to be laughed upon.

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Benedict Smith

Your friend is sick and tired and one day what she did.
Without even telling you, she called Him and told him all.
Your phone rang that night and you did not have the courage to talk.
It rings and rings again. Yet again and again.
He would never give up.
You picked up and had no words.

He asked “Why did you do that?”
As you said “You told me we are just friends”
“No, you told me this way… I LOVE YOU”
You would reply “Me too”
He said ..”What you too?? I wanna hear you saying it all”
“I’VE LOVED YOU SO MUCH AND STILL I DO”, you had a difficult time saying that.
The night passed in thinking and you consider it one of the best nights of your life.

You talk happily for hours and you wonder how time passes when he’s around.
He tells your friend he’s afraid your family wont like him.
You just smile …. Yeah he looks cute you think.
He asked you one day “If you loved me then why you never seemed jealous when I discussed other girls?”
You would just smile and tell him you knew he had been criticizing them all long.
If he was interested then he wouldn’t have discussed them as a joke with you.
He laughs and says “You are smart”.

He suddenly stops texting you first.
When you guys talk now it’s only because you hit him up first.
He would start argumenting quite often.
It became more often these days.
Things changed & you don’t understand what unexpectedly happened.
He doesn’t show that he still wants to be with you.
He would call once in a week and just talk about sex.
You try to change the topic but he is still clinged to the same.

You are afraid of the lust in his voice.
He never seemed that needy.
You are afraid that he can do anything to get what he wants.
He shows no interest in you or your relationship.
Every time he talks its just about sex and nothing else.

You become extremely clingy & you don’t know what to do.
You can’t help wondering what went wrong.
You ask him if anything is wrong & he tells you that everything is fine.
Then you start thinking he’s mad at you for something you did,
but he assures you that you need to relax & everything’s okay. He tells you that he’s just been busy
. So you wait for a while & nothing is changing.

He’s still “busy” all the time & he doesn’t even try to talk to you.
Now every time you talk to him except sex it becomes an argument.
& you get scared that you are being annoying for hitting him up first, so you stop talking to him.
Months pass, & you don’t talk to him at all.

You never know what happened from his point of view.
Because of him, every night you’re hurt & upset.
You don’t know what went wrong in the relationship between you two.
  You miss the old person he used to be & you don’t even know what he has changed into.
He tells you not to post on his Facebook as his family would make an issue out of it.
You feel strange but its just that you trust him blindly.

One day you see that he has a new girl in his life.
He’s calling her cute names & everything he used to tell you.
He calls her baby & tells her that he thinks she’s beautiful.
He smiles and laughs while she kisses him.
He has no problem when she writes on his Facebook.
He seems completely fine without you now & he has someone else to talk & text to every day & night.
You refuse to believe that he played you, but it’s true.

You just say nothing and walk away silently.
Because “Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing is the same”
You’re still hurt &  everything you do reminds you of him.
You can’t stop thinking about him & you cry every night when your thinking about him.
You watch the sky and tell GOD that
“I have been a sinner .. Forgive me for all that I thought and all that I do”

You’ve changed it all.
You don’t consider any guy different now.
You don’t let other people govern yourself and your life.
You don’t let other people know hoe you feel.
You live your own life.
You do whatever your mind says is good for you.

“Because whatever is meant to be will happen anyways”

Weekly Photo Challenge: Reflecting

Fear- our driving force

Heya everyone who is reading now or will read my content anytime after.

It was long ago since I read this quote by Khalid Hosseini. I can’t actually say from which book of his is the quote taken as I am not done with reading all of them (Although I hope to do it one day soon). Anyhow it says;

“They think they live by what they want. But really what guides them is what they are afraid of. What they don’t want.”
– Khalid Hosseini

As jigsawed as it appeared initially, the more meaningful it tended to be afterwards. The danger of confronting your worst fears is actually what keeps you running in life. If I look at myself it has always been like that. A year from now I remember sitting in my office and thinking of loosing the friends  I was attached to, and the mere feeling was enough to give me goosebumps. And here I am now a year later, distant from all that I thought was conspicuous to me.

Five years ago, as I sat in my university lecture hall, thinking that I can never be stupid enough to fall victim to any mutual attachment. And here five years later, I am fallen fickle-minded and in deep ambivalence. Well … the post got too depressing I guess (accept my sincere apologies). The central essence is that you always always are destined to meet the danger of your worst fears and you still continue to live no matter what. (It is like that for me but I hope things can be opposite for others).

Thinking of the same things one night I just jotted down a few words- a poem actually.

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Hoping to write about you one day,
What always held me back was fear,
Yeah… fear.

For I fear you’ll ace all my regrets,
and stand atop of all flaws I possess,

You’ll be a throbbing pain I feared,
Whose remembrance causes agony and guilt,

I feared starting to give you much worth,
For I may make me loose my worth.

Alas! little did I know whether I write or not,
It’s your worst fears that you always have to confront,

The most dreadful fears of yours are the ones you are bound to face,
Thus…. Here I am. 

Weekly Photo Challenge: Danger

Motivation in just one phrase

Yesterday i had a chance to attend one of the medicinal seminars regarding health care professions and the spirit of phlantrophy

The speaker narrated a short conversation between Galileo and his student Andrea which goes as follows.

(P.S: The picture may not the so clear as it is taken from a powerpoint presentation)

Andrea: Unhappy the land that has no heroes!

Galileo replied: Unhappy the land that needs a hero.

The whole auditorium burst out into claps after these two inspirational lines.

Continue reading Motivation in just one phrase

Few things I’ve learnt

I’v learned that the best classroom in the world is at the company of an elderly person.

I’ve learned that having a child fall asleep in your arms is one of the most peaceful feelings in the world.

I’ve learned that I can always pray for someone when I don’t have the strength to help him in some other way.

I’ve learned that no matter how serious your life requires you to be, everyone needs a friend to act goofy with.

I’ve learned that its love, not time, that heals all wounds.

I’ve learned that everyone you meet deserves to be greeted with a smile.