Yeah you read it right.
It took a while for me to actually write this down for the very first time here on the blog. It is easier to read about such diseases and encounter such patients on daily basis. But the easiness reverses considerably when the same thing faces you. Never in my life had I ever thought to be sitting here and writing about how I met Tuberculosis or how the Mycobacterium actually met me.
It takes some time for you initially to accept things how they are externally. Followed by the whole-hearted acceptance of a disease to the pain, shock and suffering during it. And finally, it takes enough courage to write it down and associate the name of any such disease with you.
“I have Tuberculosis (TB)”
This sentence has always been difficult as I ignore the slight stutter in my hands while typing this. It’s not easy to say that for yourself. And yeah if you don’t believe it try doing that for yourself. Place your name here and see for yourself
“________(your name) has Tuberculosis”
Something silently moves within you right?
That’s how it is.
I never even thought that I could ever be the one facing it. I held the concept that Tuberculosis is restricted to such countries where food scarcity prevails. Where medical facilities are minimum and self care is a forgotten concept.
More than a year of constant cough, frequent breathlessness and what not, but I never even thought about it. Once my father suggested that I might have TB and I jumped in an unpleasant amusement,
“Are you kidding me?”
“Tuberculosis doesn’t come up out of no where like that”
Hah guess what? It actually does. So it did in the form of extremely Extensive Tuberculosis.
Every day had been a struggle and honestly, the thirst to live and move forward was diminished completely. Where my medical books told me that it’s just 3-6 months treatment and you are good to go then. On the other hand, reality marked otherwise and soon after I was reduced to bones only. Months and months of challenging treatment where every day and every night was a struggle with no or negligible improvement. There were days when even breathing felt like a burden on me.
Mycobacterium plays with you yeah, you read it right. It gropes you physically, mentally, emotionally and in worse cases financially as well. I will be writing a series on my Tuberculosis journey in the coming days you can have a peak then. I believe I am stable enough to write a detailed account now but lets just hope I can.
After all, life is all about pleasant and unpleasant surprises. That’s the goodness in it. And
I believe its the unlikeliness of a circumstance that actually makes it a surprise.