Their Nightmares And Mine

While sitting late at night a few days back I came up with a poem stated below. It wasn’t initially intended specially for the Daily Prompt: Nightmares but it is just a coincidence that what I wrote last week has the same topic. I wrote that for my Best Friend and after reading it,

She said: I don’t like it in a way that you should have never thought about this. You were not supposed to think like this ever in your life.
Me: That’s just a nightmare buddy. Nightmares don’t come willingly, Do they??
She: Okay but you are not gonna post it on your blog.
Me: But why?? 😦
She: It is mine and only mine and mine only. NO SHARING.
Me: Ohhh okay.

Today I asked and actually requested her If  I could post my poem on my blog please and she replied:
Haha Come on buddy I was just kidding … Sweetheart off-course you can post, I know you always do. 🙂

So here I go.hh

A demon would come and capture my soul,
A curse would follow and kill me within,
His eyes would seize my every single breath,
And his claws rip off my every organ within,

A witch would come and eat me up,
A ghost would roar and chew my flesh,
A beast just tore me into tiny pieces,
A storm just came and blew my head.

That is amongst the worst nightmares they said,
I laughed silently to the lameness they shred,
And nodded,listened with nothing to be said.

I don’t care about the demons that kill,
For now it’s my turn I’ll have to tell,
I fear one day you would come to yell,
With your gaze against mine and your voice loud and clear,
When the love beholding us would suddenly disappear,

My worst nightmare – One day you would come to yell,
Apart from everything you are just here to tell,
To inform you whether you are lonely or blue,
“It’s just that I never cared for you,
It’s just that I never cared for you.”

Enhanced by Zemanta

Where Our Happiness Lies???

Once a group of 50 people was attending a seminar. Suddenly the speaker stopped and decided to do a group activity. He started giving each one a balloon. Each one was asked to write his/her name on it using a marker pen. Then all the balloons were collected and put in another room. Now these delegates were let in that room and asked to find the balloon which had their name written, within 5 minutes. Everyone was frantically searching for their name, colliding with each other, pushing around others and there was utter chaos. At the end of 5 minutes no one could find their own balloon. Now each one was asked to randomly collect a balloon and give it to the person whose name was written on it.
Within minutes everyone had their own balloon. The speaker said:_47139543_balloon

“Exactly this is happening in our lives. Everyone is frantically looking for happiness all around, not knowing where it is. Our happiness lies in the happiness of other people. Give them their happiness; you will get your own happiness. And this is the purpose of human life”

Enhanced by Zemanta

Awesome Threesome

There are a few words that give you a short memory, a reminder, a glimpse of a specific person. That can be a line from a movie, a poem or any song. This particular poem gives me a glimpse of my Best Friend. I love the deepness in it’s words and thoughtfulness and the feeling of deep love that it is filled with. All of those things that it doesn’t say fully but conveys in an indirect hidden manner.

I know a girl,
When she smiles
The rain comes pouring down

A longer day,
I may stay my ground
Be drenched from head to toe

A younger age,
I may have a dream
That tells me not to go

A smaller town,
I may close my eyes
And see her once again

I know a girl,
When she smiles
The rain comes pouring down

Whenever I read this I am entrapped by the feeling that whoever wrote it, He or she had my Friend in mind. Her laughter echoes in my ears and a part of me realizes how blessed I am to have her by my side and how insignificant words may become when you are overwhelmed with immense love and affection.

In the following collection of pictures the first one on the left shows a weird face that she makes. She has a strange habit of making cartoonish strange duck like funny faces whenever she is hyper but whenever she does that I make sure to have it clicked at the right moment. The one on the right shows one of her childhood memories. She has never been in good terms with her studies and books (like me) so she seems gloomy while holding a pencil to complete her homework, this is one of the few childhood pictures of her that I really love. And lastly the bottom one on the left is her smile, one in a million, few of the fewer things in my life that I really adore.Fotor022311040Weekly Photo Challenge: Threes

Another picture of both of us holding eachother’s hands with our hearts held in. It was actually a bracelet with a heart that she gifted me a year back, Right now it is kept right in my side table and looks as beautiful as it has always been. 🙂OLYMPUS DIGITAL CAMERA

Enhanced by Zemanta

A Woman Performed CPR on an Infant on the Side of a Highway and Saved His Life

Terrifying sometimes .. How life can be bound by such a loose thread? How unpredictable fate can ever be? and knowing it all still how ignorant a person can be?

Kindness Blog

A desperate woman jumped out of her SUV on the Dolphin Expressway in Florida, screaming for help as her baby turned blue. The Miami Herald’s Al Diaz ran among cars along the highway until he found a police officer in his patrol car and told him about the infant who had stopped breathing.

A Woman Performed CPR on an Infant on the Side of a Highway in Miami Today and Saved the Baby's Life

Pamela Rauseo performs CPR on her nephew, 5-month-old Sebastian de la Cruz, on Thursday after pulling her SUV over on the side of Florida State Road 836.

A Woman Performed CPR on an Infant on the Side of a Highway in Miami Today and Saved the Baby's Life

Rescuers on Thursday responded to Pamela Rauseo, center, who performed CPR on her 5-month-old nephew, Sebastian de la Cruz.

A Woman Performed CPR on an Infant on the Side of a Highway in Miami Today and Saved the Baby's Life

Sweetwater, Fla., police officer Amauris Bastidas hold infant Sebastian de la Cruz, age 5 months, who had stopped breathing Thursday. Lucila Godoy, right, stopped her car to assist in the rescue.

A Woman Performed CPR on an Infant on the Side of a Highway in Miami Today and Saved the Baby's Life

Miami-Dade Fire Rescue paramedic Lt. Alvaro Tonanez cuddles Sebastian de la Cruz, who in this photo has noticeably gotten his…

View original post 94 more words

It is between.. You and Him

hhhYour KINDNESS may be treated as WEAKNESS, be KIND anyways.

Your HELP may go UNNOTICED, be HELPFUL anyways.

If you are HONEST, people may CHEAT you, be HONEST anyways.

The GOOD you do today, people will often FORGET tomorrow, DO GOOD anyways.

Because it is between YOU & GOD. It was never between YOU & THEM!

When you said “Nobody loves you”

There are a few things that I can say “I hate”, but yes I can’t say that I am not agitated by anything at all. The thing I hate the most is “disappointment”. I know that sometimes people may suffer because of how they judge people without knowing that what they’ve been through. But honestly speaking I myself have been through a lot; Life has changed from shines to rust and no matter whatever you do you just have to live with it. Being disappointed, degrading yourself would never ever solve any sort of a problem. I believe in “resilience”.

Being a keen observer, a listener and an elder sibling I often have to listen to ungrateful stuff. It’s okay I admit that I do say that but I never loose hope from my Lord. My younger sibling is immature and hence very emotional at times, often exaggerating and indulged in Self Pity. I have mentioned the whole story in a previous post “Poor Me” Syndrome… Here at my Home. After that situation I decided just not to try convincing her to anything like that.smartphowned.com_380839_1374849175

It’s okay .. Lets just think that there is a person in the whole world who claims that nobody loves him at all. Okay let I be that person, so let’s say “Nobody Loves me” ( Even if it turns out to be true but still I don’t like the very sound of complaining in this manner).

Can saying that loud make me feel any better?

Does it give me any hope? Any indication ? Any motivation?

Does that give me any positivity? Any sign how I should be?

I mean does that make more people love me? I feel that this even makes me hate myself.

This would make people pitying me and even me doing the same to myself.

That just makes me feel more and more miserable.

That would never make me realize that there might be something in me that needs to be changed. Okay I don’t mean to sound that you need to change for the world but believe me a few people are really worth it. They are worth every effort that you put in. (Although I haven’t changed that much for those who are worth it but still I am trying).

What I really meant to say was that these few words can lead any person to a phase of utmost disappointment. I believe that disappointment kills every quality and every bit of positive energy that you inhibit, whether that be your will,your strength,your dignity,your way of thinking, your way of interpreting things and your overall way of living. It blocks the room to improvement and progress. When God has made every Being equally worthy, even the little animals and birds are worthy than who the hell are you to degrade yourself like that?? ( I am sorry if it sounded more like emotional and angry but this is how I feel right now).

My younger sibling often uses this sentence: “Nobody Loves Me” and I am just left silent. Sometimes it just happens that your heart answers but still your tongue doesn’t even move. Another day my friend said the same, although I replied but as usual I  couldn’t say what I actually wanted. Sometimes it’s like you have so much to say so much to explain that you just can’t decide where to start, and after silent considerations finally you just decide not to start and say anything.

In any relation that I have, I always hate just reminding them again and again that I exist and  I am right here. I used to say this a few years back, “I don’t need such people whom I have to tell and remind again and again that see I exist. If anybody needs me they should know it right away. Otherwise I just don’t need such a relation and I don’t care whatever that relation is then.”

Now whenever I think about it that seems more like an egoistic approach. Sometimes a few people forget your existence but you still can’t let go because may be there’s your fault as well in there somewhere. Or the people are just too precious to loose. But answering such things have always been difficult — really difficult actually. I couldn’t think of anything else except just to write so I wrote this:429702637_5dfa7048d6

I wanted to be an exception; when you said nobody loves you,
Felt nothing but deception; as you said nobody loves you,

I know that words change when gloom is inside,
But sometimes few words reveal what you always hide,
I know the issues matter, No matter how small they may,
I know some people say, What they never wanted to say,

I still wanted to be an exception when you said nobody loves you.
Felt nothing but deception as you said nobody loves you.

The Sound of Silence

A Land which says …..”GLOOM IS BANNED”

Expectations, dreams and wishes are associated with the existence of human life. The heart of every individual is loaded with them. The extent may be different, the intensity may be different but yet they exist and they hold immense importance in everybodys’ lives. Normally I don’t consider myself as a Dreamy Girl but yet being a human I can’t deny that I don’t have dreams and wishes. Choosing only three from them (as the Daily Prompt said) is quite difficult. Still I have to

  • I wished we lived in a land of peace, a land where no evil no misery and no darkness could ever touch us. I wish my parents, my siblings and all my friends lived there. I wish there was a land where TEARS ARE FORBIDDEN and where disappointment and Self pity finds no place. I wish to see every loved one satisfied as they pass the glowing sea. I wish the land would speak for itself and says every night that GLOOM is banned. I wish I was the owner of that Land. I wish I were the one to make their eyes again so I would have Never let them
  • I wish one night the Fears and Nightmares would come to me, To apologize for how ruthless they had been. To tell me how much strength I had shown and how their pinches I had blown. I wish that after that they would never come again for all the desires that they are never gonna gain. I wish my soul to be free of them all, I wish resilience, to fly every time after I fall.we-are-having-a-problem-with-our-commenting-system-we-apologize
  • I wish I could make my life simple, As simple as it could be, As simple as an extrovert can see (So I would rename my blog as “SO SIMPLE”). I wish to be able to see simple things as they are. I don’t want an insight I don’t want to flee. I just want to say things the way they be.complicate

OmG … Noodles Grow On My Head

I am the only Odd kid in my family which was born with curly hair where all of my siblings have straight ones. Most women in my family have sort of wavy hairs but I am the only pure curly one. My relatives keep on telling me that I have hair exactly like my maternal grandfather but as he died even before I was born so I haven’t seen him (and his hairs mainly). Being a curly kid I always seemed odd to my relatives and the elders kept teasing me by calling different names and comparing my hair with noodles,earthworms and both my paternal and maternal grandmothers use to say that my hairs are like many KNOTS tied to my head as it was very difficult for them to comb them up. This is how I looked when I was almost 5.popeye  Now I know they all loved me and they were just joking around but at that time it was not the case. Most of the times I would rush towards the washroom to see my hair in the mirror and would cry and cry and cry. My mother and my grandmother would comb my hair for like five times a day and I would always think WHY ONLY ME??

Whenever my hair were wet my mother would always say: “Mariyaah see your hair look like straight now” and I would always rush towards the mirror to see how I look now. Eventually after that they would dry and I would start thinking about the same old poor me thing. “I hate my hair”,that’s what I always said.

When I grew up and had my younger siblings my mother was more busy with them and she would always tell me to comb myself. Over these years I stopped looking after my hair,not combing them properly and no oiling at all just because I hated them.9proscons

When I was in 8th grade I started thinking to have a do-over and practically do something to straighten them up. When I asked my mom to bring me a hair straighter she thought I am just being zealous for the time being (as I was and still am not that sort of a person who cares or does much for her looks). Angry, disappointed; I told my sister to straighten my hair up using an iron (Yes it’s the one we use to press clothes) as I lay down with my hair all stretched on the ground. I know that seems insane but that’s how I had become with time. After some time my hair were straight and I ran towards my mother.

“Lalalala… See you didn’t let me do that .. But I did it by myself and now see how amazing my hair seems” 😀

She and my father was hell surprised when my younger sister told them how I actually did that.(Younger sisters always have a big mouth …. Errr… I hate it) They were both scared as well that I may burn myself If I did anything like this again. The next week my father brought me a hair straightener and yeahhh here I go. At that day I decided that from now on I am not gonna spend a single moment with these curls I will straighten them every day till everybody is gonna forget that I actually had curly hair. I am a total alien when things come to cosmetics,hair accessories,makeup and everything but soon after I realized that over the attempts to straighten my hair up again and again, they have turned to be pretty much rough and dry. I started taking care of them, combing them and oiling them properly so that I could straighten them again.

One day my routine suddenly changed when my father’s friend came over and his wife came to me and said,”Kiddo you have beautiful hair”. I looked back at her with utmost amusement. I was not happy as I did not believe her. When she left my sister said sarcastically

“Buahah Beautiful hair??? Actually she has not seen how your hair really are”.

I didn’t say a word after that but I thought to myself.

People say like this just because I said that first. If I learn to be happy with what I have, people will learn it too.

After that I stopped straightening my hair and started taking care of them. Many people used to tell me every now and then that my hair looked great and that is one of those compliments that I love the most.I laugh at my decision of straightening them every time until everybody forgets that I had curls. My hair are much grown and they are pretty long now and I like it. The straightener is always kept in the drawer of the dressing table right in front of me but I don’t touch it. Like the past I never stare at the straightener with my eyes still, hoping and wishing that some day my hair will be straight so I won’t have to use this thing. Curly hair has many many pros.16proscons2proscons








Eventually I have learned to thank God for whatever he has given me and whatever I am blessed with. Now I tell everybody that Noodles grow on my head and I am so proud of it.

Daily Post



“Poor Me” Syndrome … Here at my Home

The more I think about Self Pity For Ages.. Would I do the same?? Finally I conclude this May be I can’t decide because I am not standing in their shoes, but yet I’ve been through a lot. When I say a lot I really mean it.

ImageMostly the people who care a lot are the ones who are most difficult to make up with, whenever they are blue. It’s not a hard and fast rule but that’s just what I’ve observed. Cheering those people up normally is something that I don’t even have to make an effort for, But when they are upset — That’s just like banging my head to the wall in front of me.

I write this post as I try to convince my younger sister as she got scolded by my mother for something that wasn’t virtually her fault. She locked herself in the bathroom for hours then at bedtime she just grabbed the music player and rushed towards the terrace because she knew that I would want to talk.

Normally I don’t consider myself as a caring elder sister to the three of my younger siblings but I just try to be one. And nowadays as I am becoming more and more short tempered, I ruin all my efforts myself by just being ANGRY.

ImageThis was not the case that day. I was equally calm and persistent as I went to convince her. I decided to talk firstly about whatever happened today and then I would skip to random topics and jokes to cheer her up. I started talking and she pretended to play a game, not laying an ear on whatever I had to say. On everything I said , I got an abrupt reply full of disappointment. I hate disappointments (I guess everybody does) and even more than that I am more annoyed by those people who just don’t get these disappointments off their heads.

Anyways I just continued explaining things for her just hoping that at some point she’ll understand. When suddenly she starts banging her head on the chair (the chairs were made of iron and I bet she would’ve been hurt). I tried stoping her but it was like my words had no meaning at all.

“I hate myself, I hate myself”, that’s the only thing that she would say. I tried stopping her by my hands, and without even knowing I unintentionally slapped her so that she would stop. She stopped immediately, then cried and left for the other room.

O my! I was just trying to cheer her up and what she did?? Still I again followed her as she reached the other room. This time I decided not to say a word, instead I just told her to come with me to sleep. She told me she wasn’t in a mood and will come later. I insisted to stay until she makes up her mind to sleep. After an hour of sitting quietly we both agreed and moved towards the bedroom and now she is sleeping right next to me.

oct06_roxy02All I am doing now is just writing and watching her sleep as she breaths loudly with her mouth wide open and still looks innocent. I bet her head still hurts.